Most asinine thing you ever did with computers?

One time I set up a beowulf cluster with my server that connected to vmware virtual servers as slaves on my winxp boxes.....and actually made it work.

Just curious if anyone else does stupid computer shit just for the sake of being able to say they did it.

khrath wrote:

One time I set up a beowulf cluster with my server that connected to vmware virtual servers as slaves on my winxp boxes.....and actually made it work. Just curious if anyone else does stupid computer shit just for the sake of being able to say they did it.

I tried to build my first comp. Knew everything, just had never done it before. Turn it on and would not f*****g work. Not even POST. Tried every f*****g thing I could think of, talked to whole bunch of people, nothing would f*****g work. Finally I realized I had forgot to put the motherboard on risers when I had attached it to the case. I fried every piece, so I just returned all for a refund, saying I just didnt want it and had changed my mind, then moved.

That time I opened AIM to talk to you.

told my father in law how to get on the innernet [sic]

Was putting my wifes computer together. had all the parts sitting there. thing wouldnt boot up. could not figure it out for hte life of me. then finally it dawned on me, i had forgot to put the processor in.

When I got my first computer, I didn't know how to do anything. Someone told me that to use a floppy disk you had to format it first, so I figured the same thing applied to the hard drive. My mother then had to drive 60 miles back to the computer store to have them reinstall the OS (I think it was DOS 3 or 4 at the time).

At the end of a deployment to Ft Benning, we had something like 75 sun sparc stations set up, and we had some tools that would remotely run commands on some or all of the boxes at once. Someone decided it would be a good idea to have evey single one of them play one of the default sound files that came with Sun OS back then.

They ran it, and most, if not all of the commans looped. I think we spent about 20 minutes manually killing all of the processes off while some very irate people scowling at us. It was like 75 car alarms all going off at once.

If asinine includes "complete waste of time" I would have to say rewriting part of an mp3 player to spit out various statistics into a database. I would then gather currently playing, most played, etc., and sort in descending order of popularity, then grab the top 3. This gave MP3 stats.

Next, I had a script which updated the date and time of a porn file every time I viewed it. I called it "load balancer." Hah. This way I could always view the least recently viewed pics of lesbians kissing. With a constant slurp of l*****n kiss photos from NNTP, I would come home from work and greet the fruits of my dial-up connection: 3000 new dyke photos to beat meat over. From this list, I would categorize them (pretty, ugly, butch, old/young, young/young, old/old) by hand. Once categorized by hand, they were sent to load balancer.

Given those two stats as examples, you can imagine how I sorted incoming email, also. I had a "top 10 most recently written me" list. Also a top 10 list of who had written me the most. My girlfriend and best friend were of course in the top 2. The stats from this represented my 1-degree-of-separation social network, at least the online one, pretty well.

I dumped all 3 of those stats into the sig of every email I sent. It also had a random unix fortune. The script to dump these stats looks like this:

Code:

#!/usr/bin/perl $fname = "/home/jdunn/.signature"; $fortune        = `/usr/games/fortune`; $sysStats       = `/home/jdunn/bin/sys_summary`; $bookmark       = `/home/jdunn/bin/rand_bm_bookmark4u`; $vm3            = `/home/jdunn/bin/vm-latest.pl`; $lesboList      = `/home/jdunn/bin/latest-carpet-munchers.pl`; $mp3Stats       = `/home/jdunn/bin/myoozak.pl`; open(HSIG, $fname) or die("no file $fname"); while(<HSIG>) {    s/\$\s*SYS_STATS\s*:\s*\$/$sysStats/;    s/\$\s*FORTUNE\s*:\s*\$/$fortune/;    s/\$\s*BOOKMARK\s*:\s*\$/$bookmark/;    s/\$\s*VM3\s*:\s*\$/$vm3/;    s/\$\s*MP3\s*:\s*\$/$mp3Stats/;    s/\$\s*DYKEZ\s*:\s*\$/$lesboList/;    print "$_"; } close(HSIG);

If that's not asinine I dunno what is.

I play EQ on mine....

I was running something like 14 boxes at once in my apartment... people would come in and hear the buzzing and whirring and see the green lights at night and exclaim "jesus christ its like the f*****g brige of the starship enterprise"... I know have only 1 box at home....

gotissues68 wrote:

I was running something like 14 boxes at once in my apartment... people would come in and hear the buzzing and whirring and see the green lights at night and exclaim "jesus christ its like the f*****g brige of the starship enterprise"... I know have only 1 box at home....

rofl, that's exactly what my friends say..
And then i go "what ? you don't have a 1.2 terabyte fileserver at home? what do you use, DVD's?

gotissues68 wrote:

I was running something like 14 boxes at once in my apartment... people would come in and hear the buzzing and whirring and see the green lights at night and exclaim "jesus christ its like the f*****g brige of the starship enterprise"... I know have only 1 box at home....

Did you have a captains chair?

My most stupid computer move was creating a username and password for Realpoor

Mugaaz wrote:

khrath wrote: One time I set up a beowulf cluster with my server that connected to vmware virtual servers as slaves on my winxp boxes.....and actually made it work. Just curious if anyone else does stupid computer shit just for the sake of being able to say they did it. I tried to build my first comp. Knew everything, just had never done it before. Turn it on and would not f*****g work. Not even POST. Tried every f*****g thing I could think of, talked to whole bunch of people, nothing would f*****g work. Finally I realized I had forgot to put the motherboard on risers when I had attached it to the case. I fried every piece, so I just returned all for a refund, saying I just didnt want it and had changed my mind, then moved.

Hehe, done that.

once I couldn't get my computer to boot up after doing some shit with it .. i forget what .. something with installing the motherboard probably .. I spent forever trying to fix it myself .. finally called abit about it to make sure I wasn't misunderstanding something


it ended up being that I accidentally disconnected the connector to the hard drives while fiddling around in my case


it took me forever to try and find the problem ... finally i was talking with someone at abit and they were like "check the connectors on your hard drive to make sure .. .. . " and i was like "ugh damn it I'm not some idiot over here" ... and then I saw that was the problem and felt really awful

Desflurane wrote:

My most stupid computer move was creating a username and password for Realpoor

for truth

Quote:

All right men, rape the cattle and kill the women Ummmm.... captain don't you mean... You have my orders...!

lol

Ishmael wrote:

Mugaaz wrote: khrath wrote: One time I set up a beowulf cluster with my server that connected to vmware virtual servers as slaves on my winxp boxes.....and actually made it work. Just curious if anyone else does stupid computer shit just for the sake of being able to say they did it. I tried to build my first comp. Knew everything, just had never done it before. Turn it on and would not f*****g work. Not even POST. Tried every f*****g thing I could think of, talked to whole bunch of people, nothing would f*****g work. Finally I realized I had forgot to put the motherboard on risers when I had attached it to the case. I fried every piece, so I just returned all for a refund, saying I just didnt want it and had changed my mind, then moved. Hehe, done that.

Yeah I did that with the first computer I built. Except the motherboard sparked and ignited a small fire when I turned it on. It only melted a little and the fire was small enough for me to just blow out like a match. Surprisingly, I returned it to whoever I bought it from and said it came defected. I specifically remember the guy saying, "Ma'am, it was caught on fire. This is unusable!" And I was all, "YEAH! MY THOUGHTS EXACTLY. So how soon can I expect my new one?" I still can't believe I got away with that one.

Never did anything too asinine. Except maybe the time I overclocked my video card and it started overheating, so I used a rubber band to mount an old CPU fan to the card (the chip faced down), except that after two days the heat made the rubber band dry out and break and it dropped the fan onto the motherboard and fried it.

sinrakin wrote:

Never did anything too asinine. Except maybe the time I overclocked my video card and it started overheating, so I used a rubber band to mount an old CPU fan to the card (the chip faced down), except that after two days the heat made the rubber band dry out and break and it dropped the fan onto the motherboard and fried it.

That is...ghetto, lol